Deck Five. The Captain’s Mess. Senior officer quarters.

Personal quarters.

A safe retreat at the end of the day and a chance to recoup before what was to come in the morning.

Stepping out of the turbolift, Tikva turned to her left, looked at the door to her own quarters and sighed. Then her head slowly swivelled in the opposite direction, eyes fixating on a door to the right. Without even thinking, she went there, reaching out for the call button with no hesitation.

No answer immediately came, but she could feel the presence on the other side of the door approaching. The calm and warmth was so reassuring just in its proximity. And when the door finally opened, there she stood. Adelinde Gantzmann, her Lin, towering above her with the slightest of smiles on her face. She knew Lin had finished her shift recently and had been hoping to catch Lin before she went for the gym, lucking out in this instance, but only just.

“Can I come in?” she asked Lin, putting on a smile she really wasn’t feeling.

“Depends,” Lin answered. “Who is asking?”

The game they played, keeping their personal and professional lives as respectfully apart as they could. The question actually brought real feeling into her own smile as she reached up for her communicator, but then stopped and went for the catch on her uniform tunic, popping it, then the zipper as she went to remove the whole tunic.

Lin stepped aside, letting her in before helping slide the tunic off her shoulders and arms, even going so far as to fold it and lay it over a chair back. Far, far better than Tikva’s own intent to just chuck it over the chair back in a heap. Or the floor.

“I need a hug,” was all she could say as she turned around to face Lin.

Warmth enveloped her, strength surrounded her. As Lin’s arms wrapped around her, Tikva did the same, stepping into the taller woman and burying her face into Lin’s shoulder. She stood there for an age, could have stood there for eternity. Let the universe pass as long as she could stand right here.

“You need to talk,” Lin said softly. “You haven’t been yourself lately and I miss you. Everyone misses you.”

“I know,” she mumbled into Lin’s collarbone.

She wants you to talk idiot! So do it!

Do her!

No! NO! Talk!

She deserves it, after all. Putting up with us lately.

Ugh, fine. Talk.

“Pardon?” Lin asked suddenly, a slight shift in emotional state drawing Tikva out of her funk as she pulled her face from Lin.

She scanned the other woman’s face, studying her intently for a second, trying to parse if ‘pardon’ had been asked in response to her answer, or something else.

No. No. Could she?

Maybe?

“Could she?” Lin asked, her own brow furrowing in confusion. “Okay, that’s weird. What’s happening?”

She couldn’t help the smile. Couldn’t, wouldn’t even try to stop it. Let it grow and grow before she rocked up on her toes. “Gods, I love you,” she breathed before kissing Lin. Just a quick flash of affection before she fell back on her heels.

“I love you too, Bug, but you’re not answering the question.”

“This is gonna be a glass of wine kind of answer,” she said as she disentangled herself from Lin, turning to the replicator. “Want one?”

“Hun,” Lin answered, disappointment in her voice at the question. Disappointment that was mollified a few moments later when she returned, offering a now seated Lin a tumbler of whiskey with a single large ice cube in the middle. The happy sigh after a tasting sip was just further confirmation of a choice well made. “Start with what just happened, then we can get to what’s been on your mind recently, okay?”

She looked down at Lin on the couch, the smile still firmly on her face. Just took in the woman’s beauty, especially that which eyes couldn’t see. And then she sat herself down, turned to face Lin, tucking a leg under herself. “Okay, so…”

A half-hour later, another glass of wine, and an explanation given. Even a few attempts at probing the boundaries of this new aspect of their relationship, proving it wasn’t exactly reliable, but more than just an oddity. In the end Tikva ended up resting her head in Lin’s lap, looking up as fingers raked through her hair idly. “I still can’t believe this.”

“I’m having trouble myself,” Lin confided after a few seconds of deep thought. “It just seems, I don’t know, like I’m prying?” she asked, uncertainty in her words.

“You aren’t!” Tikva responded immediately. “It’s on me, hun. But haven’t you ever wondered what someone else was thinking?”

“Yes, but in a theoretical sense.” Lin looked down with such a gentle smile. “This is…something.”

Tikva snorted. “No argument here.”

“So, none of your other partners have ever?” Lin asked, not bothering to finish the question.

“Heard me?” Tikva finished to an affirmative nod. “No. Though Rhea once swore she heard something when we were at the academy. But I think that was just us being stuck together for two weeks on a survival course and both of us going a bit stir crazy.”

Another minute passed as Lin stared out the window. “I’m honoured,” she finally said. “Deeply.” And then she looked back down, seriousness written all over her face. “Now you. What’s bugging you?”

No avoiding it now.

She’s got us right where we want to be.

Right where need to be you, idiot.

That’s what I said.

“Bug,” Lin said.

“Betazed,” she said, finally answering the question. “Just all of it.”

“You’ve never visited Betazed before. So how can you have a problem with an entire planet?”

She just started up at Lin in disbelief, slowly blinking a few times before realisation dawned on her. Lin had been lucky, only dealing with Planetary Defence and no other aspects of the Betazed government so far. Or any of the innumerable hangers on that seemed to pride themselves on infuriating anyone not already playing their political games.

“Everything my mother warned me about Betazed just plays itself out every time I have to go down there and deal with anyone. Smiles and judgement and everyone always having something better to do. Feeling like I’m being looked down on, and not just literally. And don’t get me started on the fucking Meto Institute.”

“So, this is about the Meto Institute,” Lin stated, continuing to run her fingers through Tikva’s hair.

“Stirling finally figured out what game they were playing and while he thought he hadn’t been caught sneaking into computer systems, suspects he did get caught because apparently they have an opening to finally see me in the morning.” Tikva sighed defeatedly. “The Meto Institute counts the Ninth House as a primary supporter.”

“And that means?”

Again, she found herself blinking in disbelief, then shaking herself back to reality with the realisation she’d never spoken about such things with Lin before. It just felt so natural that this woman should already know. “My mother’s house. My mother’s house that she fled to Earth to get away from so she could live her life as she wanted, marry who she wanted and not be some pawn in some stupid, idiotic, archaic game.”

“So, someone in your mother’s family, your family, has been stopping you from seeing Doctor Meto?” Lin asked, a faint edge of annoyance in her words.

“Not my family,” Tikva half-growled. Not at Lin, but the subject matter in question. “I’ve never met my biological grandmother. Never even communicated with her in any form. Mum has told me enough about her that I don’t need to meet her. Don’t want to meet her. She isn’t my family.”

“And the meeting in the morning?”

“Likely some ambush from someone in the Ninth House. But it’s my best shot at actually getting to see Meto.”

Lin nodded in thought for a bit. “Awfully convenient timing with your warning to the Prime Minister as well.”

“Fucking tell me about it.” Tikva then sighed loudly, covering her eyes with a hand. “Stirling didn’t get caught. It was fucking me. Whats-her-name Ezea said she was going to tell the Cabinet of Matriarchs.”

“Why don’t you try hearing out the Ninth House?” Lin asked with all the patience of a saint.

“My mother has told me plenty about –”

“You aren’t your mother,” Lin interrupted, staring Tikva down when she pulled her hand away to stare up. “You are your own person, Bug.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you, love, might be a bit biased because of your mother. Maybe, just maybe, there is a solution here if you go in with an open mind?”

“You don’t know these people, Lin.”

“Neither do you,” Lin countered calmly.

Bitch!

No, she’s right.

Of course she’s right!

Yeah, I’m with Sexy Amazon on this one too.

Tikva sat up, breathing heavily through her nose. She could feel the sadness wafting from Lin behind her, but couldn’t place the cause. Sadness she’d possibly hurt her? Sadness she couldn’t convey what she meant properly? Sadness at the loss of physical contact?

This reflection stopped her from standing up. Let her think for a moment. And then she slowly turned on the couch to face her lover, donning a smile. “Why do you have to go speaking such wisdom?”

“One of us has to, and it is my turn,” Lin said as she reached out, grasping Tikva’s hand and gently tugging her closer. “Sexy amazon?”

“You heard that one?” Tikva asked with a chuckle.

“Uh huh,” Lin answered, smiling as she kept pulling Tikva back towards her. “So, what are you going to do tomorrow?”

“Go down there with an open mind, hear them out, then come back up here and face whatever is coming at us from the Slow Zone.” Tikva let herself be pulled closer, then surprised Lin as she moved closer still, straddling the other woman’s lap.

“And right now?” Lin asked as she settled her hands on Tikva’s hips.

“Right now, I think I’m going to stay right here,” Tikva whispered as she leaned in for a kiss. “And say thank you for kicking me in the ass when I need it.”